theafflicted | 02.50 - week two, saturday

W2 SATURDAY

Like last Saturday, everyone will get an announcement on their tablets; this time, the announcement is preceded with a bell of some sort before Lorelei appears on the screen again.

"Good morning, everyone. This is an announcement to let you know that today's lesson will take place starting at 8:15 tonight. Again, today's lesson will be starting at 8:15. Please meet at the lower campus exit near the lecture by 8:00pm; Florence will be waiting for you there.

If you have a bag for some snacks and, perhaps, an item you can use for self-defense in the case of an emergency, please arrive with those things on you. We will provide you with an overview of what to expect when you arrive at 8pm.

Thank you."

The alert ends.

You have the day to prepare, ask each other what the hell is happening -- Florence and Lorelei do not seem to be available, strangely enough. There's a lot to take in with the information you have now. But before you know it... night falls.

FULL NAV

(CODE)

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ it's funny because ryouma has never been on the receiving end of his own attitude and mutsu has the same quality that makes it difficult to stay angry with him. ]

It's not a suit, it's a uniform. Like the navy?

[ too bad it's a petty ghoul. ]

Which is a helluva joke because it's not like I've seen a ship in years. Instead, I just get sent around to clean up everyone's mess. I'm tired of it! It's a thankless job and I'm sick of chasin' something that'll never be! That what ya wanna hear?!

[ the force with which the words come out by the end surprises even him. maybe the words aren't entirely true, twisted as they are by what's happening, but his feelings are all muddled and have festered unreleased for so long. ]

Hope yer satisfied.

Right, right.

(He holds up a hand. Its a uniform, not a suit.

He doesn't really know exactly what Ryouma is talking about and he knows this isn't the best time to talk about it. It's definitely better to sort this out later but sometimes... you don't get to choose the time.)

If you aren't, then I'm not.

(Because his everything is because of Ryouma,)

Tell me what ya want, Ryouma

[ it's the easy agreement he doesn't expect, even though he would've done the same any other time. he's at a loss, and for an instant, he hesitates, or maybe it's the thing that still wants to pour fuel on this.

ryouma looks confused. ]

What I want...? I want what I've always wanted. I agreed to do it because I wanted to save people, not —...

[ the bitter tone creeps back in before he can finish, and the shift is almost visible. there's more to this than meets the eye, at least? ]

What am I saying? What would you know?

(There it goes again. Hm.)

Assumin' history's the same for ya... I know Tosa's a small place. Ain't never really had a lot goin' for it and if ya weren't important, ya had even less. And I know that didn't get everyone down.

(And it's here that he makes a point to look at Ryouma,)

Some people got to get off the li'l island and go to the big one. Most people would've been pretty content with that but some people knew things could be bigger. They knew the world was bigger so they wanted to dream a lot bigger too.

Some guys really didn't wanna settle... 'cause things were never enough for 'em.

That what you think? That I'm angry 'cause I settled? I didn't. I've never settled, not ever. And that was fine, only I used t' think it meant something.

[ this sort of thing was never going to be able to come out without a certain degree of splashback. he hates himself for it more than anything because who else is there to blame? humanity? the counterforce? the world? the only person to blame is himself. that's just taking responsibility. ]

I made a deal. "Guardian", is what I'm supposed to be, only I don't save anything or anyone. I've been doin' this for a very long time without a thing to show for it. Know what that makes me? A liar. Best ya quit wastin' your time.

(He wants to say this isn't like Ryouma but he knows that isn't true. For all of the hero worship and idolizing that people do for him, Mutsu knows the real Ryouma was just a man with a dream. He was a man who stayed up late at night and talked to himself and wrote himself in circles when no one else was watching. He was a man that wondered about hypotheticals and if he could have done things better instead of the way he had. Nothing was ever good enough for him because--)

I think its the opposite. You're mad 'cause you can't settle.

(He doesn't really get what this deal is. What it means to be a guardian. He knows Ryouma was summoned like him and he can only assume it has to do with his own job. His new one.)

And... I don't think there's nothing wrong with lying. Sometimes ya gotta lie to get things done but right now... you're not lying, right? You'er tellin' the truth.

[ stop that. it's a sudden, intrusive thought ryouma isn't sure even belongs to him. it's hard to tell. it's not like he wants to talk about this either. no one here likes to be perceived. ]

I was s'posed to create a happy world. A better world! That's what everyone was countin' on me to do and I let 'em all down.

[ that's the heart of the problem, really, and why he has so much bitterness and resentment directed inward as much as outward in his situation. ]

(Is that it? He wonders how much Ryouma knows. It sounds like he doesn't know anything about his impact on the world at all which... well, if he thinks about it, it makes sense. Ryouma died so why would he be able to perceive the world after his death? It's not like him, a sword spirit, that continues to exist and observe the world even from the darkness of a museum case.)

Ya don't know?

(He's calm when he speaks,)

Don't ya know how much ya did, Ryouma?

What're ya talkin' about? I never finished the job. Gettin' close ain't the same as succeedin'. Now I don't even get close. Now all I ever am is too late.

[ always too late to stop what leads up to all the death and destruction, but right on time to avert the crisis directly. a fixer. it's not a good feeling. not for so long; it's a cruel reality for someone like ryouma. ]

That ain't true! Yeah, it's a shame ya died before had to but... ya did a lot!

You were never late, Ryouma! You were ahead of your time!

(Ahead of everyone! He means it genuinely.)

02.50 - week two, saturday

no subject

no subject

1/2

2/2

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject