w3 afterparty

[selfconcept]

Everyone passed! That's great! But Wei Wuxian is gone and you keep getting a weird feeling. Maybe it's the adrenaline that's dying down. Maybe you saw something strange because you're tired? It'll all be uncovered on Sunday. Why not take a breather for now? If you're injured, ask Florence for some medical aid. (can be handwaved) It's around 10 PM when you're released.

Comments

[catarou]

[ He glances to Fai, pulled out of his thoughts. ]

Not nearly as well as I would like. [ But he gives him the barest hint of a smile. ] And yourself?

[partymagician]

Ah, I think I'm in the same boat as you.

[ He laughs a little, his exhaustion evident. ]

I knew things were going to get more difficult from here on out, but...

[ What a doozy! ]

[catarou]

Well, at the very least, we're prepared.

[ Prepared, uh huh, sure. ]

I wonder what else we will be subjected to. [ a pause. ] ... It's unsettling, how strongly some of us responded to it all.

I certainly did, anyway.

[partymagician]

...I did too.

[ He looks down at his lap. ]

You know, I thought I'd be strong enough to keep myself together during some of our more stressful lessons. I was proven wrong today.

[catarou]

[ He watches Fai for a moment. He understands that, too; perhaps Gentaro and Fai are cut from the same cloth in many ways neither of them have realized.

The hypocrisy of what he tells Fai next doesn't escape him. It's easier to extend this sort of kindness to others, rather than to himself. ]

On the contrary, I don't see you as weak. There is incredible strength in allowing yourself to be vulnerable. As cruel as the world can be, your capacity to trust on any level is hardly weakness.

It feels terrible, that much is true. Yet... we're still standing here, even if it's on shaky legs. It would have been easy to refuse and risk losing something important. But refusing to give in, therefore protecting something precious takes a great deal of strength and courage.

It isn't easy to let yourself be seen. We showed each other something we've kept locked up tight. I admire you for that. More than that, I'm grateful you listened to me, and grateful that you trusted me.

[partymagician]

[ It’s interesting, the way Gentaro says exactly what he needed to hear. Although, Fai wonders, maybe it’s because he understands why Fai felt so weak.

There’s that strange feeling within him again, the knowledge that someone understands. He doesn’t know if he’ll ever get used to it. ]

You’re right. We did what we had to do to keep ourselves, well, ourselves.

[ Fai falls quiet, mulling over everything. ]

…I was afraid I would lose my memories of my brother. I couldn’t let that happen.

[catarou]

[ ... Ah. Gentaro nods. He isn't surprised, of course. ]

I feared the same thing. That... or my memories of Dice and Ramuda.

[ How different would he be here and now, sitting next to Fai, if those memories were stolen from him? ]

A desperate situation calls for desperate measures. Even if we never asked for this, we had no choice but to play the game. As someone who has made a great deal of mistakes, it is the aftermath that defines us more.

[partymagician]

...You're right. It is.

[ But what does that mean for Fai? Has he done well in the aftermath of his childhood.

He isn't sure. ]

I'd like to say that I hope next week won't be so difficult, but I'm worried it will be even moreso.

[ Can they stand to potentially lose part of themselves again? ]

[catarou]

I agree.

[ He sighs, frustrated. ]

All of this is so wildly out of our control. It's infuriating.

[partymagician]

Mm. It is.

[ He lets out a long sigh, practically resting his head on the table. ]

I think I'll sleep for a few days.